• Become a King or Queen of your Throne

    Introducing Wipeless™ bidets
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Our Wipeless™ bidet bars will change your life.

Spray It, Don't Spread it
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Stop being such a dry ass.

Buy a Wipeless™ Bidet Bar

Less Chop Chop.

Talk Dirty To me

Be an Eco-Friendly Royal!

Lame on your Throne?

Spray it, don't spread it

A rose by any other name..

Sign up for more information to win one of five fresh off the boat Wipeless "Shitkicker" Mk1 unit bidet attachments. These beauties are going to change your life, there's no other way to put it.

Less worrying about hangers-on, way less wiping, less paper breaking or running out of roll. Plus...

The gentle but effective spray will treat your skin like the soft petals of a rose.

Now that's real poetry.

Go Wipeless™